


I Still Love Her

by xLitheKitty33



Series: Dramione Drabble Fest [3]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Voldemort, F/M, Hufflepuff Draco Malfoy, I hate myself, POV Draco Malfoy, Romance, Slytherin Hermione Granger, Songfic, This is terrible, i have no idea where i went with this, i mean voldemort is sort of there but he actually died when Harry Potter "killed" him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-03
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2019-03-12 22:06:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13556535
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xLitheKitty33/pseuds/xLitheKitty33
Summary: Inspired by Lana Del Rey's I Still Love Him, but it is quite different from the original and what I had in mind at first.





	I Still Love Her

_And I remember when I met her, it was so clear that she was the only one for me._

The first time I saw her was on the train to Hogworts the first year, she was reading a book, like she always did. It was a book my mother often read to me after my father's passing in the first wizarding war. It was very similar to Magical Beasts Where To Find Them, but it had been packed with so much more information that went into more depth and even contained different stories that included each of these creatures.

I was always shy, and was too shy to ask to sit down next to her, but there was no where else to go. She glanced up as if she realized I was there and gave me the brightest grin I have ever seen **anyone** give me. She patted the seat next to her and tilted her head, letting the waves of hair cascade down her shoulder.

She was mesmerizing.

I quickly sat down as she spoke about the book in a trance. I nodded, watching her eyes glitter and listened to the power, ambition, and passion she had as she also explained what she would do one day to ensure that they would get more fair treatment.

_We both knew it right away._

In the second year, I sat with her again, but we didn't speak, we enjoyed company in each other's silence.

After all that time she had kept her head down because she was reading, she wasn't feeling too well. As she ran to the bathroom, I followed behind her and held her hair away from her face as she vomitted into the toilet.

I never knew how but she still looked cute even while vomiting and cleaning up her face from doing so. She quickly pushed me out the door and I could hear her muffled screams into her hands, embarrased, as I held my ear to the door. I took a step back as she opened the door and quickly held out my hand.

She tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear as I began to blush, unable to come up with any words as to reassure her so she didn't get upset. All I could remember was that I kept thinking, I really liked her smile. She nodded and gave me a hug before we walked to our cart hand in hand.

 _And as the years went on, things got more_ _difficult -_

We never had any classes together, her being a Slytherin following her ambitions and I in Hufflepuff trying to become more outspoken, it was very rare and we didn't talk much. Sometimes, we would meet up in the library and everyone would want to talk to her. The muggleborn who was placed in Slytherin. I felt left out so I would leave, I don't think she ever noticed really.

_We were faced with more challenges._

She and I grew apart, but she would always greet me warmly and expectantly. And then she fell in love with someone else.

She was always by him and he didn't seem to enjoy my company very much, so I left her be.

Her friends and he didn't like me, they would tease me and hex me when she didn't know or was around. It pained me to leave her alone, to not talk to her as much. The thought occurred many times that I should've have been in another house but it seems I was too useless to be in Slytherin then and had no place in any other house because I wasn't smart enough, or passionate enough, nor brave enough.

_I almost begged her to stay._

At the Yule Ball she was with him and almost danced with him all night, but they took a break as he was getting bored. He truly didn't appreciate her spunk like I did, her liveliness, how beautiful she was. I danced with her, and almost told her how much I wished she would be with me. We had a fight, her boyfriend and I. He was possessive of her but didn't treat her well. It was irrational, and I didn't know what to do, but gave the first blow.

I vividly remeber when she found out, and she was fuming. I grabbed her arm gently as she looked at me hurt, and then shrugged me off and walked away with her nose held high as always.

After that we didn't talk anymore for a while. Even though he was out of the picture, so was I. I didn't blame her, but she knew that it wouldn't be for long that she could stay mad at me, so I finally said sorry.

_Trying to amend the damages and all our beginnings_

Back in fifth year, I told her apologies, and I gave it my all to make it better, to show I had changed.

She accepted me. She smiled again, the dazzling smile I always adored, that I was captivated with. No one could pull at my heart like her. She gave me a hug being the affectionate person she was and went on her way.

_She was charismatic_

She walked around like she owned the place. She always used her wits to charm others into liking her. Perhaps it had something to do with the way she spoke. The way she smiled. Perhaps even the way she moved and walked.

No one truly could hate her nor deny that she was a queen.

_passionate_

Everyone knew everything she stood for, many couldn't stand her rambling as she spoke about all these topics, these ideas with a hunger in her eyes. I always listened patiently and she always thanked me for that.

Not only was it hunger but also a desire, this desire made her powerful, strong. She had ambition and something she strived for. She elaborated to me that she would do **anything** to make it work.

She was everything I wasn't. I wouldn't blame her though and I never knew how much she could mean to me, nor did she to me at least then.

_intelligent_

She gave tutoring sessions but not for free, there was always a fee. You would have to pay her in knowledge, maybe even a date, sometimes she just wanted food or attention. There had to be something in it for her. I still owe her a couple of dates, not that she probably kept count.

She always came up with the most interesting answers, the most thoughtful papers and they were very well researched.

_and everyone knew it._

Everyone knew she was at the top of her class. She was amazing and smart. She was given the most interesting tasks and no one could say no to her.

Everyone wanted her attention, especially me.

 _When she walked in every man's head_ _turned, everyone stood up to talk to her._

I remember when she and I strolled as partner patrolling perfects in our sixth year. Everyone always went up to her, talked to her freely.

She would tuck her hair behind her ear, slyly looking up from her lashes as always and then she'd grab my wrist and say that we must be going somewhere, to finish our rounds. To speak with a professor. To work on a project together. Something, but it worked in getting us alone. We would get interrupted again not too soon after and I could tell she was very irritated but she hid it very well to others.

_She was like this hybrid, a mix of a woman who couldn't control herself._

She outshined everyone else and no one had eyes for her any more than I did.

She was flirty, and beautiful. She had been with many people. She had been to many places. She was a person of many accomplishments.

She would touch my arm and we'd talk for long hours about anything and everything in our private common room in seventh year when we both became Heads of the Perfects. It was refreshing.

_I always got this sense that she was torn between being a good person_

She had stayed up again, reading the news about her parents. They had been in a crash in Australia, and couldn't remember anything. She didn't go see them, even though I insisted and she never elaborated the topic further.

_and missing out on all the opportunities life could offer a woman as magnificent as her._

Despite all the talk she stayed away from working in the ministry, she rejected them just so she could stay with me, just so we could elope away from all the prejudice of this world.

_And in that way I...understood her, and I loved her._

No one truly liked me there, it was only her that could find it in her heart to say I was not my father. I was not that dead man's son. I was me.

I knew why she didn't accept, it was because of me and she didn't was to hear about those opinions of me because she wouldn't want to contain herself. Others weren't as accepting as her.

_I loved her_

We were outside one day, and happy. In love,  together and strong in that way.

_I loved her_

She was pregnant with our child of 38 weeks. I will never forget the wisdom and brightness of her eyes that she provided for me. The love from her that fueled me.

_I loved her_

We walked freely and sometimes I would scoop her in my arms as she sequeled for me to put her down because she was too heavy. I didn't mind.

She always did let her gaurd down with me. I was thankful for that.

_And I still love her._

We didn't notice the person lurking in the shadows but she clearly heard it. She stood to protect me and said words that I never wanted to hear leave her lips. I went to shield her because she was pregnant and she had our future, but somehow she still took the hit. It was still a blur to me.

I would do anything to change it if I could. I try not to think about it.

_I_ _love her._

**Goodbye, stay for me. If only time was kind.**

I lost both of my loves that day.

**Author's Note:**

> This didn't turn out the way I wanted. I had any attempts at this. Originally going with their original houses. I do like playing around with their backgrounds and stuffing them into different houses though so I did that.  
> I wrote this in first person even though it's been a while but it turned OK?


End file.
